Caleb’s ah-ha moment that most adults don’t ever think about

by Holly Lanesmith July 28, 2021

Lately, we’ve been talking a lot about standards in our household. Do we want to have high standards or low standards?

When the subject was brought up, Caleb (age 5) asked, "what are standards?" Good question – how do you explain standards to a 5-year-old?

So, Holly responded to him, "well, standards are like expectations. You know that we expect you and Emerson to be good listeners and to be obedient. We expect you to be kind and respectful. Those are our expectations of you, and we have high expectations – we have high standards for you."

Caleb started nodding his head slowly with that gradual look of understanding spreading across his face.

So, I jumped in as well. "Caleb, think about the restaurants we go to. Your favorite restaurant is Capital Grille, right? (…to which he nodded yes). Capital Grille is a really nice restaurant isn’t it – they have nice tablecloths on all the tables, little candles, nice plates, and silverware. The server is dressed very nicely and talks to you very politely and professionally. That’s a high-standard restaurant, isn’t it?"

To which Caleb emphatically responded, "yes!!!"

I continued. "Or there’s McDonald's. McDonald's doesn’t have tablecloths or a server to come and take your order and serve your meal to you, does it?"

The ah-ha in Caleb’s mind was clearly becoming more and more pronounced. He piped up, "McDonald's isn’t a high standard restaurant, is it? It’s a low-standard restaurant, right?"

"You’re absolutely right, Caleb. Now, here’s the question… do YOU like high standards or low standards?"

And once more with emphasis, Caleb responded, "I LOVE high standards." (Lol – when he loves something, he LOVES it!)

We went on to talk about the clothes we wear, the home we live in, the places we go, and the people we spend our time with, and how it’s important to have high standards in your life. If you want to enjoy "high standard things" (like restaurants like Capital Grille, good relationships that are mutually beneficial, nice clothes that are comfortable and feel good, etc.), the standards start with you.

You won’t have the opportunity to go to and enjoy high standard places, people, things, etc., if you don’t first have those high standards for yourself, those high expectations – in how you behave, how you think, how you treat others, and how you treat yourself.

This whole dialogue really got me thinking about my own life. And I too had some ah-ha moments. I realized I had let things slide in certain areas of my life, in my standards for myself and how I wanted my life to be.

Honestly, I haven’t been eating as healthy as I know I want to, in alignment with my values around my physical health and taking care of my body temple. So, Holly and I have just started a detox for the next few weeks, and I’m committing to following it because I do have high standards for myself and my physical health, and I’m going to do what I need to do to live up to those standards.

I realized my commitment to "OQP" (Only Quality People) in my life had slipped, and I was allowing "energy vampires" (you know those people who just suck the energy right out of you) to have access to me and to have room in my life.

And so, I’m cleaning house and I’m making some adjustments to only spend time with and allow access to people who are pluses in my life and to whom I can be a plus in theirs – "Only Quality People."

Even when I looked at how I spend my time – what my daily habits and routines are – my standards had slipped a bit. It’s time to get back to spending more time with the people I love and care about most in the world. I’m going to keep my work time focused on those core things that only I can do in the business – those things that are right in alignment with living my purpose.

I have to let my team carry out all the other tasks that are necessary for the running of the business, but aren’t necessary for ME to do. I can’t do everything, otherwise my tank runs dry for the most important things. I’ve got to hold myself to high standards for how my time gets spent.

These are just a handful of things I am working on right now. I’m going back to the basics and looking at the standards I have set for myself, and addressing whether they’re high standards in alignment with my values and my purpose, or if I’ve let them slip.

What about you? What are your standards in the different areas of your life? Are you living in a "low standard" state of existence, but wanting things that match higher standards?

You simply won’t attract "high standard things" in your life if you don’t set those high standards for yourself and stay disciplined to stick to those standards.

I could go on about this, but I think you’ve got the point. The people, places, and things you attract to your life will rise to the level of standards you’ve set for yourself. Period, end of story.

It’s probably time for some self-evaluation on your own standards. Would you agree?

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